


David &

by nilolay



Category: Schitt's Creek
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-11-28
Updated: 2019-12-01
Packaged: 2021-02-26 01:21:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 1,965
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21595291
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nilolay/pseuds/nilolay
Summary: Some lil baby ficlets from prompts, all of which happen to involve David talking to people.
Relationships: Alexis Rose & David Rose, David Rose & Moira Rose, Stevie Budd & David Rose
Comments: 44
Kudos: 49
Collections: The Rosebudd Ficlets





	1. Don’t Give Me That Look | David

David doesn’t talk to himself all the time. If he’s in a really good mood, or a really bad mood, mostly. He’ll idly sing-song or he’ll grimly mutter, respectively. Today he’s brightly scolding. He was flipping through another of the motel’s ancient (okay not _that_ old) magazines and found, to his uncomfortable surprise, a photo of himself.

He was on some red carpet or other, attached to the arm of one of his higher-profile ex-nothings, and he was giving the dazzling but strenuously controlled smile of someone who needed the world to know he was happy, successful, loved. So he gives a sharp laugh- “Don’t give me that look!” And then a soft murmur through a sympathetic smile for his past self- “You don’t know a thing.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Prompt from RhetoricalQuestions: “David telling any character of your choice “Don’t give me that look.””


	2. I Can’t Do This Right Now | Alexis

“David you know how much I want to help you but I actually can’t do this right now-”

“Do what? I haven’t asked you to do-”

“There’s actually _such_ a weird bug in here, David?” 

“Ew, don’t tell me that.”

“And like, I have kind of gotten used to weird bugs in the Galapagos, so when I say this one’s _weird_ -”

“It’s weird, I get it.”

“So you know I really can’t be advising you on seating charts right now David?”

“I was just asking whether Ted likes Ronnie, or if Ronnie likes Ted, because I don’t even know if-”

“David! I’ll call you back!”

“Okay! Bye! Love you.”

“…ugh yes love you too David... _EW_ it’s _on_ me!” 

“Ask it if it wants a seat too.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Prompt from olivebranchesandredwine: “I can’t do this right now.”


	3. That Wasn’t The Question | Stevie

David cocked his head thoughtfully. “You know, what I’ve learned? Is that one doesn't really _have_ anything, you know? Like you can possess things, but god knows that can be _tragically_ temporary… But those things aren’t important anyway, and all we _have_ is our relationships, um, friendships…and it’s important to be, like, _kind_ and let each other…”

Stevie wasn’t buying it. “Uh huh. Deep. That wasn’t the question.”

David raised his eyebrows and pursed his lips in feigned innocent ignorance. “No? What was, um what was the question?”

“Do you have any fours.”

“Ugh.”

He laid down two fours. 

“I win.”

“Ugh y _eah I know-_ I’m having another drink.”

“Are you sure one can really _have_ wine, though?”

"Mm. I can, you can't."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Prompt from Distractivate: “That wasn’t the question.”


	4. Comfort | Moira

“David, dear, I can’t help but feel a little bit responsible.”

The admission was a tiny relief. Maybe there was someone else to blame. Maybe it wasn’t just because David was stupid. Maybe it wasn’t just because Patrick was a liar. It felt comfortably teenaged, to blame his mother. It felt like all that expensive therapy. He leaned into it, because he had to lean into something, since he couldn’t lean onto someone.

“Well, good, because you are. I told you I didn’t want him to come. You didn’t take me seriously. You don’t take me seriously. You _never_ have.”

He heard his voice, which had been soft and broken since he heard Alexis say “fiancé”, become an accusing shout. He expected it to be cathartic. For a second, it was.

Moira’s fiery defensiveness had been activated- David could see her physically trying not to retaliate in full force, which was something. “That’s not true, David.” Is all she said. But it was. They both knew it.

“I need to be alone.”

That wasn’t true, but in that moment what could Moira do but take him seriously?

“Okay, David.”

She left.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Prompt from metalshootingstar: “Moira and/or Johnny comforting David after the events of The Barbecue”


	5. It's For You | Rachel

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Well this one isn't small but DelphinaBoswell gave a really big prompt, so. 
> 
> "Patrick doesn't go to the Barbecue, but Rachel does and her and David discover their connection to Patrick."

**Patrick:  
How’s the family thing at the motel?**   
  
**David:**   
**It’s fine. Dad and Stevie got into some kind of stand-off at the grill and none of the burgers were rescued at medium rare, so it could be better.**

**Patrick:**   
**Stevie’s there?**

**David:**   
**Yeah. I mean, it’s her motel, sooo**

**Patrick:**   
**Right. That’s a shame about your burger.**

**David:**  
 **Thank you, I know. Also this thing was supposedly a celebration for me but Alexis brought a random sad girl.**  
  
Patrick frowned. _Huh, once again, who knew you had so many family members?_ Delete. _Oh, so randoms are invited but not your boyfriend?_ Delete delete delete. _Why were you being celebrated? Because of me?_ Wow, delete.

**Patrick:**   
**Aww.**

**David:**   
**I guess this day is still worse for her than for us.**

_At least she’s not all alone, like some people._ Delete. Patrick has never been great at texting but he knew from experience that passive aggression through text usually only led to a blow-up phone-call, so he’d been avoiding text conversation altogether, lately. But he’d take any communication with David he could get. It was just a matter of curbing the impulse when something was bothering him. He tried again.

**Patrick:**   
**Poor thing.**

**David:**   
**She’s cute. Some guy’s been dicking her around. Her energy is ruining our thing but I do feel bad for her.**

**Patrick:**  
 **Because she’s cute?**  
  
 **David:**  
 **Yes. Cute people shouldn’t feel bad feelings.**  
  
Patrick didn’t even type out _like not getting invited to things,_ so that was progress. He took a breath. He was annoyed. He should put down the phone and do something else to cool off. He didn’t want a fight. They hadn’t fought yet. He didn’t know how that would go and he didn’t want to find out. But he couldn’t keep this conversation up much longer, this trying to keep it cool. He would put down his-

**David:**   
**Sorry, I’m being told off for “Forsaking the bygone days of social niceties”. Talk to you soon xx**

**Patrick:**   
**x**

He put down his phone. So, the family thing was some sort of barbecue, which Stevie was at, and which was open to random plus-ones. But not to Patrick.

He picked up his phone.

He put down his phone. Heavily. It bounced a bit.

He picked up his phone.

He stared at his open message thread and tried very hard not to type anything. He hit ‘back’. He stared at his list of unread threads. His mom, some advertising spam, Rachel. Well, it’s a distraction. He opened his thread with Rachel. He read the messages from the past few days.

Fuck.

Oh, _fuck._

_Oh, FUCK._

Heart rate skyrocketing, breath abandoning lungs, his shaking hands fumbled to call David. 

…

David put down his phone and trained his attention back to the conversation at the table. Alexis was pouting at the stranger, hand lightly resting on her wrist, in what David recognised as an attempt at comfort. Alexis was nice. Niceness was a thing Alexis did, now. Alexis was being nice and David shouldn’t be annoyed. And he should be nice, too, probably.

“So um, where are you from?” That was a conversation thing that people said.

She gave a town name, with a “You wouldn’t know it” caveat, which, presumptuous. He had heard of it before, he thought, maybe.  
  
“I know it.” He said.

“You do!” She smiled, surprised.

“We had a Rose Video there.” Johnny beamed, thrilled to have something to contribute.

“Oh my god, of course, you’re _those_ Roses. Wow.” The girl lightly hit her own forehead in realisation, which was charming.

“Are we, though?” Moira challenged, head tilted, clearly musing on the transience of identity.

“I used to love Rose Video. My boyfriend worked there.” That was apparently a sad memory, because she was smiling sadly.

Johnny hummed. “No kidding! Let me think- branch…785. Impressive late fees! Your boyfriend must have been diligent. Good choice.”

She cringed at that. “Yeah, diligent, that was him. Or, still is. _Was_ my boyfriend. _Is_ my fiancé.”

“Wow, same guy? That’s a long relationship.” David remarked, nicely.

“Actually, David lots of people have lots of relationships longer than four months.” Alexis supplied, with the air of niceness but not the spirit.

The precise angle at which David raised his wine glass told Alexis to fuck off.

“Are you in a relationship?” The girl cleared her throat a bit, smiling at David. “What’s…he? What are they like?”

David smiled and raised his eyes a little, in search for the best way to describe Patrick, who he missed right now, and who should be sitting across from him, who would be touching his leg with his own leg and making David feel better about his moment being stolen, with bright and sympathetic eyes, who deserved David’s trust and who really made a very good move with that cookie, which David missed right now, which-

“He’s diligent,” Johnny supplied, proud of himself for the insensitive callback.

“Well, yes.” David conceded. “Also extremely cute, thoughtful, funny, and makes a very limited outlet-based wardrobe work for him _very_ well.”

“And quite the _artiste musicale_ , his Pat.” Moira beamed.

“Did you say Pat?” The girl asked, eyes narrowing a little, which, fair.

“We absolutely didn’t,” David shot an authoritative look at Moira, “Because his name is _Patrick_ ," it always felt like a small treat to say it, "and we’re _not_ doing Pat.”

It looked like the girl’s face was glazing over a bit. Poor thing, bereft of a fiancé and now made to hear the praises of someone else’s boyfriend.

“Sorry, we should stop-” David winced.

“No, no. It’s just, my fiancé is a Patrick.” She laughed a little. “He’s a musician too, and cute, and thoughtful, and everything. But I can’t imagine my Patrick being your type, you know, unless he’s changed a lot in the six months since he moved. Like, a _lot_ a lot.” She laughed harder, but darker, with a nervous question in it.

_“I’ve never done that before, with a guy.”_

_“You know what? We didn’t even get into your history-” “Lock it up, David.”_

But that’s- not-. David shook his head briskly and matched her laugh with his own.

“No. Patrick would have told me if he’d worked in a Rose Video.” Like that was the matter at hand, David.

David was staring at his blackened burger. Everybody else was staring at David, or at the space between David and the girl, this bombshell whose name he probably should have tried harder to catch.

“Maybe not, David. Maybe there’s a lot more to find out about each other…” Alexis, suspiciously.

“Like… a _lot_ more.” Stevie, darkly, eyes flashing.

That town name did sound familiar, and not because of Branch #785.

Moira’s hand was on his wrist.

“What’s his, um, surname? Just out of- just curious, interest, in- in names.” He tried laughing again, but it just came out a breathless, mirthless huff, begging for an impossible answer.

The girl didn’t seem as far down the path of inevitable destruction as David was. The idea that this was a case of mere coincidence and not a shocking betrayal seemed more likely to her. She mustn’t have been there before, like David has. Her tale of woe had been of a different kind- disappointment, not humiliation- until now. She wasn’t used to this moment. Poor thing.  
  
“Brewer.” She said.

And it made no difference to David, in that moment. She may as well have said it when she arrived. She may as well have said it when David took ticket B13.

Because of course. Of _course_ she said that name. Of _course_ this was happening. Of _course_ Patrick was engaged, was lying to him. Because this is how it _goes_. And David was so _stupid. Again. Again. Always._

Still, around him, it was _shock_ that rippled between everyone else at the table, enough to alert the poor girl of the reality, and her response was shock, too.

Shock because they didn’t get it. They didn’t _get_ it. His family and Stevie had teased him and needled him that morning and he’d tried to explain but they _didn’t get it._

His phone rang. Patrick’s impish grin lit up the screen. Beaming. Teasing. Mocking. Taunting.

David slid the phone toward the girl.

“It’s for you,” he said flatly.

He stood and walked to his room.

**Author's Note:**

> Luv ya rosebuddies, luv ya muses.


End file.
